The screaming-barfies.  Known also as the ‘hot ache’.  Is a horrible sensation supposedly most frequently felt by ice climbers (no sheeze you are basically cuddling a wall of ice).  But as a connoisseur of cold weather torture I can tell you first hand, “Owww Ow! Ow! Ow!”

My first experience with the burn was when I was just a wee figure skater.  I distinctly remember coming off the ice after a 4 hour ice-show session taking my skates off, putting my fleece mittens on my feet, curling up in [the go to] fetal position and bawling.  It was awful.  But you got to the point when you knew once it stopped surging a painful fire through your lifeless feet that you would be ok.  I remember it so vividly….they were on fire.

As a skier I still go through the same awful episodes.  More often in my hands than in my feet.  There are days that my hands will start to warm up during my ski.  Sometimes its just a soft burn… but other times they burn so hot they ache.  A nauseating deep ache.  I drop my poles. Swing my arm wildly.  I use some choice (and often strong) language.  The only comfort comes in the form of experience….  Knowing they will feel better shortly.  And then your hands ease to a soft warm.  So comfortably warm.  You just have to tough it out I guess.

Maybe today was so bad because it was my first big freeze of the season?  But man it was distinctly painful.  I was very much screaming…while simeltaneously contemplating barfing.  My hands hadn’t felt too cold until I came inside to grab a pair of skis.  It hit me hard and fast.  Clumsy.  Nearly doubled over.  Looking for an escape route if needed.  (no one likes puke in their ski bags)  Eventually it passed.  And I was thankful to look at the end of my sleeves and see that my hands had not actually imploded.

Needless to say tomorrow I’m bringing my mittens… and hopefully another ounce of composure.