Yes the snot rocket. A handy tool that once mastered will make your cold weather activities more enjoyable and earn you some serious trail cred. Come on, you can’t tell me the cold weather doesn’t make your nose drip.
So whats the best way to dispel that exorbitant amount of snot threatening to steadily drip from your nostrils?
The Snot Rocket.
It’s easy enough. After checking the wind and double (yes do it twice) checking where your team mates are you may now attempt to dislodge your snot. It’s simple really. Cover a nostril with your thumb or finger and then blow. I like to use my thumb… sort of using my hand as a spray shield. Ok I know, I never said this was going to make you look pretty!
You might need a little courtesy wipe, sleeves and gloves are both acceptable. Some times you just have to tidy up your face a little bit. Because lets face it no matter how great your legs look or how musclebound (or extra skinny for you biking types) your arms are, being speckled with your own snot is not well… glamorous.
‘the only time you may be covered in your own snot (and I suppose slober) is during a race… this however will be corrected once you regain consciousness’
Now before I let you go blow snot where ever you please there are some additional ground rules:
You WILL do your best to not blow snot on yourself or anyone else
Although ‘the snot rocket’ should generally be reserved for use only during physical activity, you may discretely use it in SEMI-public places.
I use the term ‘semi’ rather loosely as the appropriate vs inappropriate locations for snot-rocketing has come under much discussion… Just ask yourself next time you go to dispense your snot, “Is this totally inappropriate right now?” If you find yourself hesitate at all you should probably stop.
Snot Rocket at your own risk.
Here’s a little tib-bit for you high school athletes… Using the snot rocket on the start line of a cross country running or track race gives you major intimidation points. Fully tested and Corrine approved.
If for whatever reason you read this and begin to question your ability to properly blow your nose… I say to you. Buck up buttercup! Blow your nose you wild winter animal!
If not I will personally safety pin a hanky to your mitten you grandma.