For those of us racing domestically or internationally Christmas time offers up a great little break after the start of the season.   And although my season has infact hardly started I was grateful for the opportunity to catch my breath.  Mostly I needed some time to quite my mind.  To relax.  To gather and then quickly dismiss my thoughts.  And it was pretty perfect.

Its a rare thing to have the Malcolm Siblings all in the same place, and having all three of us home was both exciting and maybe overwhelming for our parents.  But its been alot of fun.  I haven’t seen any of them for more than 7months.  And although living far from my family is no new gig for me its always a little hard (that never really goes away).

Another great thing about being home is getting to ski with all my old team mates.  These girls are pretty awesome.  And although we all were in different grades going through school it dawned on me this morning how much our lives over lapped.  Soccer, Logrolling, Figure skating, Music, Running, and finally… (magically?) we all settled on skiing.  We are all, in our ways, clawing tooth and nail to scrap our ways onto the international circuits in cross country skiing and/or biathlon.  Our high school coach much just be ecstatic right?  I’ll answer this one for him. Yes. obviously.

We’ve been training altogether the past week here in Hayward (our old stomping grounds, the town’s darlings who could do no wrong).  And even though we are working with a meager 3 inches of snow here in the northland the trail coverage is impressive.  The trail still needs to fill in and level out a bit, but aside from that its some grade A rock skiing.  The groomers are working it!

The sun joined us for a wonderful ski on Christmas eve as we covered the freshly groomed Birkie trail.  Goodness I’m spoiled.

(L to R: Coach Pierce, Erica, Jenny, Me, Molly, Elizabeth, Emily, Jon, Mrs. Pierce)

Today I reached the point of exhaustion.  Physically. Mentally. Emotionally.  By the time I made it home this afternoon I felt like lead.  My mind was heavy and slow and my body was not far behind.  I managed to shower and then my emotional bonk set in.

Me and the couch took a good hard nap.  That… and some vanilla ice cream are slowly healing this overwhelming fatigue that has crept in deep and swiftly.

A team mate of mine just started up a blog recently, and her most recent post really resonated with me this weekend.  Give it a read.  anneliescook.wordpress.com

Or so it would seem.  And you guessed it.  I have another one tomorrow.

Today. Oh today….  Today went a baby step better than yesterday.  So I guess you could say it went as planned?  I managed to properly loose the race in a matter of seconds.  Awesome yes?  Thats biathlon for you.  You can go from a solid 15 seconds up to a minute back in a matter of seconds.  As my coach would say, “Corrine, you have fallen in love with the most amazingly frustrating sport on the planet.”  And I think that is a perfectly accurate picture.

So as my love affair with biathlon rages on I only hope I can put together better and better days.

Fun Fact:  After the race tomorrow I will have successfully doubled my time on snow this season!  Wild, right?

Although I am not where I would like to be right now and not where I know I could be right now. I’m ok with it.  (ok obviously I want much much more, but to keep me from ripping my hair out with shear frustration…. I am ok with it, I am ok with it, I am ok with it. has become my mantra)

So its not ideal.  But here’s the thing.  Even with all the nonsense of the last few months I’m further ahead than I was at this point last season.  And even though my racing form is far from right on and I’m far from 100%… I’m happy.  Mostly because for the first time since August I am able to ski with out being in constant pain.  And I will take that over great races right now!  Because being able to ski without every single pole plant shooting searing pain through my arm and shoulder is something that I am so truly grateful for.

So this morning was the first race of the season.  And let me tell you… it was every bit as rusty as I expected.

I know I’ve only been on my skis for a whopping 7 hours.

I know I haven’t skied a single race since last…. March?  Really?!

I know a week ago I was doing rollerski intervals on a treadmill.  …Talk about desperate!

I know that I am unfortunately in better cycling and running shape right now than anything else.  Duathlon maybe?  Too bad.

Now that I’ve rehashed all that.  If not for you but for me, lets move on.  And so instead of the string of expletives I would rather type lets do a little race recap instead.

Nerves aside I was ready to have a little fun this morning.  Do what I know how to do.  And if need be… be that kid sticking her tongue out at the people counting my penalty loops. (thank you for humoring my antics as I skied around and around the ‘bad place’)   For my limited time on skis I was actually pretty happy with how skiing felt today.  I don’t remember flailing about… sure it might have happened but in my mind atleast I felt like I was doing a really good job skiing controlled.

Its taken me a long time to realize that moving my limbs faster does not directly translate to moving any faster on my skis.  Because of this enlightening revelation I’ve been focusing on skiing bigger and more powerfully and hey maybe actually utilizing my assets.  I’m not built like a fairy so why ski like one.

So for not being a terrible day on skis I really just had to mess it up on the range. (if its not one thing its another right?)  Making all sorts of really awesome rookie mistakes.  The wind had picked up since we zeroed.  I did take the time to acknowledge this as I skied into the range to shoot prone.  I even double checked the wind flags.  Heck I even thought to myself, “Self, those wind flags are DEFINITELY blowing harder than before we should take two or three clicks left.”  Genius self!  Genius!  And then for whatever reason I decided to NOT do that.  Yep.  I really have no explanation for it.  Wind flag denial maybe?  I don’t know.  But I was lucky I got any targets to go down.  With three penalties in prone, that was very much the end of my race as far as results are concerned.

I faired better in standing with only two penalties.  But lets face it… 50% shooting is bad.  If it was an exam, I wouldn’t have passed.

The good news?  I have another race tomorrow.  And then another race after that.

I never gave up on my skis.  I never cursed out loud.  And most importantly… although it was far from ideal it was better than I did this time last year.  I know I’m coming from behind.  I know it won’t be easy.  and I know I’m ok with that.  Today was a jumping off point.  Baby steps. One day… one race at a time.

The screaming-barfies.  Known also as the ‘hot ache’.  Is a horrible sensation supposedly most frequently felt by ice climbers (no sheeze you are basically cuddling a wall of ice).  But as a connoisseur of cold weather torture I can tell you first hand, “Owww Ow! Ow! Ow!”

My first experience with the burn was when I was just a wee figure skater.  I distinctly remember coming off the ice after a 4 hour ice-show session taking my skates off, putting my fleece mittens on my feet, curling up in [the go to] fetal position and bawling.  It was awful.  But you got to the point when you knew once it stopped surging a painful fire through your lifeless feet that you would be ok.  I remember it so vividly….they were on fire.

As a skier I still go through the same awful episodes.  More often in my hands than in my feet.  There are days that my hands will start to warm up during my ski.  Sometimes its just a soft burn… but other times they burn so hot they ache.  A nauseating deep ache.  I drop my poles. Swing my arm wildly.  I use some choice (and often strong) language.  The only comfort comes in the form of experience….  Knowing they will feel better shortly.  And then your hands ease to a soft warm.  So comfortably warm.  You just have to tough it out I guess.

Maybe today was so bad because it was my first big freeze of the season?  But man it was distinctly painful.  I was very much screaming…while simeltaneously contemplating barfing.  My hands hadn’t felt too cold until I came inside to grab a pair of skis.  It hit me hard and fast.  Clumsy.  Nearly doubled over.  Looking for an escape route if needed.  (no one likes puke in their ski bags)  Eventually it passed.  And I was thankful to look at the end of my sleeves and see that my hands had not actually imploded.

Needless to say tomorrow I’m bringing my mittens… and hopefully another ounce of composure.

Seriously a great read!

If you have a moment or two you should read this post by Dave McCahill.

And then once you’ve done that you should probably read the rest of them.

Now I do not know if you are a ‘dog person’ or not…. but if you are anything like me you probably are.  Which therefore means… puppies make your heart melt.  (yes baby animals and men playing guitars, you just can’t help it)

I’ve often joked about kidnapping people’s dogs, strangers or not.  Since I can not currently own a dog myself, yes you guessed it, it is frowned upon by the OTC.  And lets face it, you can’t really cuddle up with a fish…  And so.  For now.  I borrow.  have play dates with.  and jokingly threaten to kidnap. other people’s dogs.

And I’m pleased to announce that for the week I have done just that!  Getting my puppy dog fix.  The house I stay at when I compete or train in Minnesota has two dogs.  Loveable, wiggly, furry, cuddle monsters.  You could say we hit it off.  It was love at first butt wiggle.  And since northern minnesota is such a ‘happening’ place…. they have slowly become my sole/soul companions.

Jasper and Cedar.  My surrogate amigos.

Now I have a question… Are pets like children?  Are you not allowed to have a favorite?  Honestly I do not know how parents do it.  Jasper and I have known each other for a while.  (the love runs deep) but now there is the new puppy Cedar.  And I love Jasper, but Cedar is so little and wiggly and cute.  …not that Jasper isn’t cute… back and forth back and forth.  Maybe I’ll understand it some day down the road when I have my own children… or pets?  Maybe I should start with plants…

About time, right?!?!

After a morning of waxing skis I got out for my very first ski of the season.  (does one trek up the tollroad on waxless skis count?)

It was awesome!  Ok so my standards are pretty low right now, for snow that is, but I was super impressed with the Mt. Itasca crew once again.  In a place that has had practically no natural precipitation this winter the snow they have out on the trails right now is pretty spectacular.  Its no winter wonderland but its clean and hard packed.

Some impressions from my first attempt on the skinny skis for the year…

Why are my skis so long? Are they suppose to be this long?!  They’re so slippery, AHHHHH!

Flail Flail Flail Flail. Glide. Flail Flail Flail.

Note to self: skis do not ‘roll’ onto shooting mats…  May or may not have nearly face planted getting into prone the first time

WWEEEEEEEEEEE! …oh dear do I look as ungraceful as I think I do?  Sure doesn’t feel pretty.

Much awkward body confusion getting off the shooting mat with skis.   Some near misses.

Ending with covering skis at noon as my stomach tried to eat itself.  What I would give for a wax tech…and maybe some blueberries.

Today I arrived to a very different Grand Rapids, Minnesota than I’m used to…

This very day last year I opted out of a warm up Minnesota Cup race because it was “too cold”.   Am I in the right place?  It was 40 degrees when I arrived.  There is even less snow on the ground here than there is in back home in Wisconsin.  Its far from the typical subzero Arctic temperatures we expect to greet us in the annual pre-Christmas biathlon races.

Today might be the exception warmth wise…  Apparently the Northern Midwest has been every bit the opposite of the Adirondacks.  While its been raining and hovering right around 40F in New York its been pretty darn cold here in Grand Rapids… the precipitation just hasn’t come yet.  The folks at Mt. Itasca have been making snow for over a week now and they have almost 2km of trail covered.  I know it isn’t much, but its a start!  And hopefully tomorrow I will be skiing lap after lap on it.

How many loops do you think it will take for me to get dizzy?

Being a professional amateur athlete has its up sides…  For instance, I’ve picked up some obscure talents that may or may not cross over to the real world some day. (yeah right)

Some of these skills are, but in no way limited to, the following:

Constructing drying racks/lines out of whatever means necessary.  Often containing shoe laces, rifle cases, lighting fixtures, vents, and wire clothe hangers…

Wielding large cumbersome objects through tight spaces, and not causing bodily harm to any innocent bystanders.

Knowing exactly how much 50 lbs is.  (If I can heft it onto my shoulder in one movement it is under 50lbs….every time)

Knowing how to trick scales into thinking your bag is only 50lbs.

The ability to sleep anywhere, anyplace, anytime, any how.  Bonus points for doing so in the middle of a 5 person row in the back of a plane on an 8 hour flight.

Cooking entire meals on a hot plate.

Smiling your way through customs.  ‘Wait… You?  …have the firearm???’

Counting to 5.  Well atleast 3…

…

If anything I’m set up wonderfully to be a hobo if this biathlon thing doesn’t work out.